This chick is paranoid.

It is uncomfortable to start blogging on a site that has been dormant for over two years, but I have a strange aversion to starting brand new internet projects for the sake of my own focus.  It seems wasteful.  I know how many half-finished or half-started websites there are out there.  They bother me.

Besides, the intent of the original blog here is not all that different from my intent as I write today.  How could it be?  My new ideas belong to me as much as the old ones did.  However, where this place was intended to be centered mostly around the activities of our children and homeschool (driven by our faith), I would now like to break away from the limits of such a focus and just blog.


I have been mulling over the decision to start blogging again for some weeks and especially since watching a YouTube talk by Fr. John Hollowell on Being a Digital Catholic.  I realized that I never lost the desire to blog, but had instead lost the courage.

It is easy to relay little anecdotes about the kids or to document home-improvement projects (other blog... long story), but I kept running out of material.  Not because the kids ceased to be amusing or because our house stopped falling apart, but because I could not find the motivation to write only about such things as my faith deepened.  There was so much more going on in my life - in our lives - and in the world that I wanted to write about.  But I didn't.  I didn't write about it because it wasn't safe.

I have an extreme fear of criticism.  I know, I know... No one enjoys being criticized, but this is bigger than that.  I think.  I may simply be paranoid.  Someone out there may be thinking that right now as a matter of fact:  "This chick is paranoid."  I hope no one decides to point it out in the combox.  See? I'm already spiraling into a panic attack.   *deep breaths*

Fears aside (still there, but aside), I will be blogging again.  About... stuff... and everything:  About being Catholic in a mostly non-Catholic area where even the Catholics don't know what it means to be Catholic.  I'll probably make some people angry.  (Please forgive me - I love you.)  About my own discoveries and revelations.  About the trials of raising children Catholic in a world where there is absolutely nothing tangible to back up my claims.  ("Okay, I know the priest doesn't genuflect before the tabernacle and I know they literally move the altar out of the way for the Christmas pageant, but I'm telling you... Christ is truly present...")  And, yes, about homeschooling and home-improvement projects, too.

I hope my continued presence here on Blogger serves as inspiration for others (with more important things to say) to take the plunge into Catholic blogging.  Such blogs have been instrumental in my late formation in the Catholic faith.  Knowing that there are others out there who simply believe can be the help you need to get you through some real darkness.

Thank you.

I forgot to blog.

Not forgot, exactly.  I've just been trying to spend less time on the computer talking about doing things and more time actually doing things.

The first day of school brought an itch to record the occasion somewhere - so here I am.

What I accomplished today:  

Completed introductions for all subjects to all students before 3pm CST.
Put ingredients for red beans & rice dinner into slow cooker.
Drank plenty of fluids.
Loaded the dishwasher.
Distributed popsicles.

What I did not accomplish today:

Laundry
Dusting, sweeping, or vacuuming
Dog grooming (see previous item)
Painting
Lawn care and maintenance

I have a feeling the 'did not accomplish' list is going to remain fairly constant for the next several months at least.  Teaching all five kids at once is .. uhm.. a challenge.  More accurately - trying to teach four kids while Peter thwarts my every attempt is a challenge.

But, gosh, he's cute.

Well, the turkey thawed in time... Everyone is well-fed and we had a fantastic day.

My favorite thing about Thanksgiving? Turkey makes little ones go to bed early. :)

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!

Thanksgiving 'Uh-Oh' Moment

Uhm.. What day is it again?

We have a turkey. This is good. We have actually had our turkey since Saturday evening. That's probably the earliest we have ever gotten a turkey for Thanksgiving Day. This is also good.

Problem: The turkey is frozen solid.

Oh I know - it's only Tuesday - there's plenty of time to thaw the 28 pound bird in time for roasting! Right? Absolutely. That's exactly what I was thinking... Exactly what I was thinking all day today when I wasn't actually thawing him out because I have plenty of time....

It's 9:23 pm on the Tuesday night before Thanksgiving. It just occurred to me that I will need to make the stuffing for our meal Wednesday afternoon. No wait - that didn't just occur to me because I already knew that. What DID just occur to me is that tomorrow is Wednesday. This has everything to do with the 28 pound turkey-shaped chunk of ice in my refrigerator.

I need to extract the giblets bag from the turkey in order to make my stuffing.

That sound you hear is the sound of me sobbing quietly into my sleeve.

I'm heading off to the kitchen now with a hair dryer and an ice-pick. I'll let you know how it turns out.

What I learned in homeshool...

Geo & Wm at the mall trying not to look too embarrassed to be seen with their mother.

I have come to truly appreciate and be thankful for being blessed with the means and opportunity to homeschool. I have always said that we are fortunate... or blessed... or that I'm grateful. To be honest, I think all of that was mostly lip-service. Even as I said it I didn't really understand what a gift I have been given:

I am actually raising my own children.

I am there for every scraped knee... every first word... I'm there for the arguments and I'm there for the moments of self-doubt. I get to share in every triumph and every new discovery. Yeah - okay - so it also means that the responsibility for whatever goes wrong sits squarely on my shoulders.... It's not like we mothers don't end up with the lion's share of the blame in our modern public-schooled society anyway... At least I get a little heads up when it comes to my parental shortcomings and I'm not going to be informed of them at a teacher's conference or in a post-it note stuck to a book bag.

Geo chugging cappuccino. I keep trying to explain the concept of 'sipping' to him - to no avail.

I have gotten to spend real time with George and William. I feel as if I have actually gotten to know them - the people they are... Whether it's one of our tangents during instruction time or chatting during a trip to the coffee shop on Friday -- I wouldn't give up this time we have together for anything. And I keep asking myself -- when would we do this if they were in school?

William @ our coffee shop hangout.

Sad to say - but I really do feel like I missed a few years of their lives. Back in the old school days my relationship with them was composed of checking clothing sizes to order uniforms, grilling them about homework assignments, feeding them, doing their laundry, rushing them through the door in the morning, and putting them in bed in the evening. I felt like the boarding school house mother. Now I'm sure - quite sure - that other parents are perfectly capable of having a deeper relationship than that with their school-going kids. The important thing here is that I have realized that I was not.

I promised Geo that I would stop posting his pictures on my blog without his express consent when he turns thirteen. With his birthday practically around the corner - I find that I must take this opportunity to post whatever I have on my desktop.

I know it won't last forever. I still look forward to the day when all my fledglings take off on their own. I hope they learned what they needed from their time with me.

In the meantime, I am learning so very much from my time with them. And there it is - the big realization: All this time I thought that our Lord was calling me to homeschool because there were things that only I could effectively teach my children.... How could I not have understood that what was missing from our family was all that the children had to teach me?

I was just reading back through all of those other homeschool posts on this blog where I stated confidently that I had finally 'figured it out' or 'found our groove'. I couldn't help but notice that those statements were always followed by a blog silence of several months before being canceled out by a red-faced 'okay, so maybe not' post.

So there has been another blog silence of several months - but this time.. No. Really. I mean it this time.....

It's been an excellent year for us so far.

We have taken the week off for the Thanksgiving holiday and I am really missing school this morning. I even took out the Latin flashcards earlier and thought I could casually work them into conversation or something.... But the boys are too smart for me. A holiday is a holiday.

Happy Birthday, Peter!!

My how time flies... Peter has turned two. He had a great time today and I'm proud to report that all of his siblings genuinely tried to make his day special. Way to go, kids.

Inspiration for the week.....

In case you haven't seen it:

The Best Photo of the Month by a long shot

I would give anything for my boys to have a chance to participate in something like this... To be surrounded by young people who are proud enough of their religion to go public - en masse. Simply splendid.

Happy Halloween!

Only the girls dressed up in costume this year for the trick or treating thing. The older boys stayed home to help with distributing candy while Peter stayed home to keep things interesting. Teething baby + 400 trick or treaters in your front yard = mildly stressful.

Emily's costume deserves another photo. She loved her wig.

Ghost cookies have been a family tradition here since 2002. We make the batches together - the kids have fun either cutting them out or shaping them by hand and are always amazed at just how simple it is to give their ghost some extra personality with chocolate chip eyes. The tradition continues with the eating -- before eating each ghost cookie we offer a prayer for a soul in purgatory.

Happy Birthday, Yvonne!

Yvonne turned six today.